i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
