yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
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