Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
