what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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