Me. At least after what I've been through.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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