Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize