i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
