i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
