i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
