I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
