adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
only you would photoshop your dick
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I'm getting married
To pizza
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
