When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize
