he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Woke up backwards on a recliner
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
