i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Randomize
