PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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