He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
