2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
