He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize