Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize
