help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Randomize
