why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
