Pregnant stripper...not hot.
its not stalking. its research.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
