Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
