therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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