I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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