a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
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