Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize