i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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