Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
as a side note pls kill me
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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