Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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