Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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