Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
