I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
