I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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