Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
