tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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