It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
