Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
