sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize
