the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Randomize
