He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I will pee on everything he values.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
