wat bout pragnant strippers??
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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