What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Small penises have feelings too.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
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