it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
