I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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