Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
