yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Randomize