so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
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