There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
