I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
