Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Randomize
