are you so shy because you have an std?
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
